Home for Melbourne cup

Home, what is it? A place,a person or perhaps a smell. The crazy bird kammakzing our bedroom window, the unholy mess on the dining room table, two crazy whippets, the shaded deck. It all adds up to something special. We have just returnd from our 4 k walk around the cycle paths and I am in love with this part of the world. Michael wants to go travelling, but I just want to stay and savour Ashgrove in the spring.

day 4 post op and discharge

Well that is the good news and I couldnt be happier, but a very special thank you to all the wnderful staff at st Andrews. What is it about nurses? They seem to be born cheerful and caring in the extreme. No wonder they top the list of the most trusted professions. Now I have not untill this point understood that, being as i am of the doctor variety, but I do now so from the bottom of my heart, a very big thank you.
I guess by the time ou are sitting around waiting for the next meal, it is certainly time to go home. I have managed to gain a kilo with all the sitting around and frequent meals, bit like airlines (probably not QANTAS), but I have been give permission to walk, as much as I like just avoiding lifts over my head and cycling is not on till at least next Friday. so the cycle path is clear dor the next 5 days. then watch out,
Love to you all
Carmel

day 3 post op , home stretch

Hi all,
woke to another beautuful day and from my point of view each day is wonderful
Today - another significant milestone - I get to change the dressings on my head, WOW WOW. please understand that ny head feels like there are an army of ants moving across the shaved scalp so all I want to do is scratch like crazy, Poor darling Michael is fearful that I will bust the head wound. Not a chance - it is wrapped so tight that there is no getting to it ( untill today)
Yesterday, I got my drip out. WOW WOW and yesterday as well, I got my device. YEAH YEAH This currently is programmed to simple settings only ie only Peter Silburn and his team can dial it up and turn me on. Visions of the Manchurian candidate, are not inappropriate. I can imagine Michael with the device wanting to " turn me on" - OK OK iget it, not appropriate for a family blog, but somewhat hiliarious anyway. on - i'm free and normal, off - I'm frozen like a stone, on - I can sing and dance , off -I just sit there expressionless. On- I can play music (OK now I am getting carried away)
It really is one of lifes little miracles and I am so glad to be born in an age where this is possible
One of my silent concerns pre-op was that now there would be no excuses. I would have to participate and to a lifelong introvert, this was a concern, No promises now, but I suspect that I will want to join in , grasping life with both hands, kicking and screaming as I ride rhe roller coaster.
Love to you all
Carmel

The ugly reality

This is me deeply into DBS Courtesy of James from medtronics

last deal on 2 for 1 now over

Hi all,
Neale/David and Robyn have just been to visit ON THEIR WAY HOME!!!!!
Can I just say how jealous I am, but the main purpose of this post is to now tell you all that the special Cardiac/neurosurgical offer of " 2 for 1" is now closed.
If you come now, you get the special of Carmel accepting a cup of hot coffee in her L hand without even thinking about it! no shakes, no tremors, oo anything!
Apparently accordning to Robyn I look like I did 5 years ago. I do find this a little strange as I was not doing any buddhist monk interpretation then as I recall. But I am a bit miffed that dbs has done what years of expensive moisturiser has failed to achieve
All fun aside, I think people around me notice the difference more then I do.
but I must say I do feel freer, looser,,happier than I have felt in ages, looking forward to getting back on my bike, preferably without falling off.
And I have to say a big thank you to you all but especially Michael, who has struggled through this with me. Darling - I really do appreciate all you have done for me.
Love to you all
Carmel

the morning after

I'm awake and alive and have a lot to be grateful for -but ( and there is always a but isnt there) I think I would like to be a time travellor. Then I could travel forward in time to a different place. A place where my head didnt feel like it was going to drop off because it was too heavy for my shoulders and my chest didnt feel like it was trying to hide an ever expanding balloon… OK now I have got the grump out of the way, time to face the day
Michael came in again last night with scrabble and though I tried to concentrate, my heart and competitive spirit were just not in it. I'm starting to realise the insidious effects of endone. Pain relief is all well and good, but it saps energy from you and makes you nauseated. so on the whole I think I'm better to stick with good old panadol.
Peter Silburn has just been in reassurung me that all is going well. he has just "turned me up". the voltage that is. spparently,if you turn it up too soon, all hell reaks loose in your head and you start getting strange dyskinesias etc. Dont want to go there so I'll live with the slow and steady approach. He is very reassuring.

Upgraded

For the first time in my life , when it really mattered, I scored an up-grade. The deluxe suite at the hilton, has nothing on ICU ( first class) St Andrews.
I was placed in a room alone to enjoy the opium dream. The noise of other patients was irrelevant.
I feel much more alert this morning after realising that I could say no to the offer of more endone (oxycodone narcotic) .Michael unfortunately got the very sleepy narcotic doped wife last night . He tells me today that it was OK.
The nurses are uniformly wonderful and encapsulate the reality of the caring profession.
I really dont know what people complain about with hospital food. I find it fine.
Maybe my taste buds have been affected as well as other neurones
I trip upstairs today to a room with a view, not Venice, just 5D,
Love to you all Carmel

Believe it or not, this blog was typed by Carmel herself today at an admirable speed (I typed yesterday's blog in case you didn't pick it). She really is looking so much better today and is already finding smiling more automatic, rather than aconnscious action - like coming out from behind the stone wall. She can tap her fingers faster as well - a favourite neurological test for Parkinson's. So things are looking up! Love Michael